I am AKAP

I hate and like you.  It's like I want to throw you off a cliff and then rush to the bottom to catch you and then stab you in the face, say sorry and cry.

June 17, 2017 Saturday I spent a day with the children in Chosen Children Village, Silang Cavite. I used to attend such programs back in college, nursing days. Where & when we fed and played with children (with different health conditions). It always feels great to help and make people happy, especially the young ones. Last summer, I decided to spend my birthday in one of the charities in Cavite or Las Piñas City. However, I wasn't able to get the date I wanted and because of the other circumstances. I felt bad not to pursue that plan, so I went there, together with 2 of my close friends. I saw how beautiful the place is and realized that there are STILL, REALLY, good people in the world. The staff are very friendly, they call each other MAMA and PAPA. It is a picture of a big happy family, maybe not by blood, but a family by heart. There are children with down syndrome who play with others, no discrimination. They always wear smiles in their faces. Everything is very li...

Last night, yeah, last night, I guess. Hmmm or maybe weeks ago. I've thought that maybe, just maybe, I need some changes in life. But then again, I still cannot figure out when and how to start. I wanted a new job. I got one and I thank God for that. Who am I to complain? I finished school while working for 3 companies. I didn't know how I did that, but yes. School's over and I can finally take my LET . BUT then again, why do I have this feeling that maybe, just maybe, that isn't for me. Why can't I have an exact answer? What do you like, Ana? I am so confused and it kills me and those tiny brain cells. I said, I just want to live life the way I want but I do not know exactly what I really want. I am not sure if it's a serious matter or what, I feel like I need someone to counsel me and just open my eye. I don't know. I have nothing to be stressed and scared of and I am damn sure of that. Contentment, I guess. That is missing. He already put everything o...

I've just finished the series, " 13 reasons why" and I feel like writing. (For those who do not know what that is, it is about a girl who recorded the 13 reasons why she killed herself.) I still didn't get it. Why do people just end their life? Just like that. Life is cruel. We're not perfect. We commit and make mistakes. Each of us has a problem but killing oneself is never a solution. We can never escape the challenges in life. We have to face it. We must face it. God gave those struggles because He knows we're capable. We may feel that no one's with us. And that is wrong. We get scared at times. We're afraid to be alone. No friends, family and partner. We think that the world just turned its back on us. We're wrong. God is always with us. We may feel as if He's not there but He is. Always. He will never leave us. Alone. Hurt. In pain. TRUST him because he trusts you. He believes that you're strong. You are STRONG...

INFLATABLE ISLAND "The biggest floating playground in Asia" http://www.theinflatableisland.com/ THE FLOATING PLAYGROUND MAP (Photo grabbed from the website) LOCATION : Subic Bay waters located at Purok 6, National Highway, Lower Kalaklan, Olongapo City, Zambales, Philippines (outside the Freeport Zone). RATE:   (Photo grabbed from the website) We took the SPRAY (morning pass: 8AM-11:50AM) for 999pesos online. The recommended package, why? Playing under the sun is really exhausting, I guess 4 hours would be enough for you to enjoy all the floats, not unless you're too playful like that, if so, you may take the whole day pass. Another thing is, the sun's too up in the afternoon. I guess, sunblock lotion will be useless. oa (just my opinion) ☺ What to bring? (in the floating playground) NONE haha! ⮞GoPro (optional) I recommend you to bring one cause it's always great to capture fun moments with your loved ones. (in the island) ...

"Tama ka, tama na." Ikaw lang ang tanging makakapagsabi ng, Tama na. Tama ako. Ikaw lang. Alam mo kung bakit? Ikaw ang napapagod, nahihirapan at nag mumukhang tanga. Hindi kailangan idikta sa iyo ng ibang tao na, Huy! Tama na. Mali ka! Mali ka. Hindi mo makita ang iyong halaga. Bat ka nag titiis? Mahal mo? Tama ako no? Oo. Mahal mo. Sapat na ba yun? Siguro. Panigurado. Tama ka, tama na. Mali ako. Kasi ayun ang iyong tunay na nadarama. Masaya ka ba? Oo. Mukha nga. Pero di tanaw sa iyong mata. Tama ba ako? Oh sige tama na. Tama ka. Tinamaan ka kasi sa kanya.

I found myself talking to myself It sounds crazy, creepy I guess. I heard her say ENOUGH I asked why? and what? Why stop? if that makes you happy Enough of what? I didn't get it. Then, I realized. How TIRED I am. Not with my life but with nothing. I am tired of nothing. I need a break. A break from all these shts I need some air. Fresh air. I wanted to pack my stuff and fly. But didn't have wings to do so. I wanted to get away. Away, where nobody knows I exist. #iamakap